Sometimes you might need to face an interview unprepared. But that does not mean, you will have to loose it. Here are some amazing mindset hacks which will help you crack the interview, even if you haven’t prepared for it.
1. Release all attachment to the outcome before you go in.
Ever felt really disappointed, angry or upset when they didn’t get a job offer after an interview or a series of interviews? This is because you had an attachment to the outcome. It means YOU had an expectation that was not met, and when your expectation was not met you started to feel feelings of disappointment. The thing is the expectation was set by YOU in the first place.
No one promised or guaranteed you a job offer, you formulated the possibility in your head so strongly that when it didn’t happen you felt a feeling of let down.
There is nothing wrong with getting excited about an opportunity that seems to be going well, but I want you to realize that you set the expectation, and it was within your control. You chose to set the expectation in your head, which is what led you to then feel strong negative emotion when it didn’t work out as you had thought it would.
It’s like dating, if you are dating needy and desperate the interviewer can feel that what I mean by that is if it’s obvious this is your only opportunity and you really really need it, then that’s going to come across in your demeanor, we once interviewed a lady who came across like this, and when she left, the HR representative said to me: “I feel like if we don’t’ hire her she won’t be able to feed her kids” But you know what? We can’t hire someone based on that reason, in fact, just the opposite happens. She didn’t get hired and it was because of her needy graspy energetic presence.
The opposite being that you have lots of options going for you, so for example if you’re dating no one and you meet a hot guy at the coffee shop and you flirt with him and get his number, then you’re literally staring at the phone waiting for him to call or text you… That’s needy and graspy, whereas the opposite is highly sought after and in demand.. So in the same situation you meet the hot guy at the coffee shop, you flirt and he asks for your number, but then you are also making plans with 5 or so other guys… Then when that guy does text you, you’re like oh yeah! I totally remember you… but you’re not sitting around waiting for him to call or text… Do you see the difference?
So you might be thinking, but I’m not highly in demand at the moment, well you need to do a couple of things about that 1) start opening up more opportunities for yourself and always have things in your pipeline, I have a technique called Opportunity Stacking that teaches you the exact steps to do this, and then start imagining what it would be like when you are highly in demand, what would you act like? How you would you approach an interview differently? How might you talk and how might you answer their questions? For example, if they asked you if you had any other interviews? Instead of saying no this is the only one I have, so I’m really hoping it works out, you might say well I’m being considered for a few other opportunities right now but I’m very excited about this one! Which (by the way) If you are actively speaking to other people, and putting yourself in the running for other positions, you are technically “Being considered” and so that is completely within integrity to say to them.
Plus saying it really makes you feel a lot better than having all your eggs in their one basket.
So when you do go into the interview, you want the energy of curiosity, enthusiasm, but not needy, desperate or graspy, and the thing is that it’s all about the thoughts that you choose to think that will dictate how you feel and in turn how you show up. For example,
Needy Graspy Thoughts | Confident, Unattached Thoughts |
I really hope this works out it’s all I’ve got (lacking in any other options) | I know that I will get my dream job whether this turns out to be it or not (100% belief and commitment in the end result, no matter how you get there) |
If this doesn’t work out I don’t know what I’m going to do (panic) | I’m really interested in what they are doing and I’m keen to learn more about how I could fit in and how I could help them (Curiosity from a place of serving) |
I need to make sure they like me (people pleasing) | I am going to make sure I prepare as best I can and find out the info I need to know to best meet their needs (Confidence in your ability to prepare and get ready to talk about your value and how it pertains to their need) |
I really need this job because I really need to make an income or I’m going to be homeless (coming from a place of lack and desperation) | Whether I get this or not I’m going to be really prepared to crush this interview and learn everything I can from the experience. |
I need to know everything before I go in because otherwise, they will think I’m not smart (impossible standards) | I know I can figure things out, because I have done so many times before (Confidence in yourself and your ability to find the right answer, even if you don’t have it at the moment) |
You can create self-confidence within yourself even if you have none right now. So how do you do that? First, you need to be aware and pay attention to the thoughts you have that are making you nervous. I have heard several thoughts from clients that are impeding them from showing up confidently here are some for example:
I need to know everything or they will deduct points from me
That thought is not useful because it makes the person feel panicked.
If you change it to: No one knows everything I know a lot more than most people and will do the best I can. Ask yourself how that feels instead?
You can change your thoughts around at will, and this will create confidence or the opposite of confidence, it’s up to you.
2) Put yourself in the interviewer’s shoes
The best way to put yourself in the interviewer’s shoes is to get inside their head, and the best way to do that is to ask them questions, and the quality of the questions lead to the best quality answers. Your brain is like google if you ask it a dumb question it will give you a dumb answer. So if you ask it really good questions, you can start to discover great answers that will help you put yourself in the interviewer’s shoes.
Here are some great questions to ask:
What does the hiring manager really want?
What’s his/her biggest stress/worry right now?
What does he/she most want taken care of?
What would be his/her dream come true for this position be?
What would blow his/her mind if it could be achieved in the first 3 months?
3) Think like your the interviewer’s equal
So our society has instructed us to put interviewers up on a pedestal and treat them like a king or queen and do or say whatever “Your majesty wants” and basically disregard our own wants and needs. I call this respecting authority a bit too much for our own good. We’re taught to respect your elders and ask permission etc.
Talk to them as you would talk to your existing boss. Act as though you are wanting to do the work they need, and you’re trying to best understand it so that you can provide the best outcomes possible for them.
4) Know the difference between commitment and 100% commitment to your end goal
When someone is committed to a goal it’s pretty easy to say that you’re committed in the beginning. But what does that really mean to you? For most people, they aren’t really sure until they are really in it and have fallen down a couple of times. It’s easy to be excited and motivated on day 1 of a goal. Day 1 or even week 1 is natural feelings of motivation and excitement. Say your goal is to get your dream job, or even to lose weight? In the beginning, it starts high energy full of excitement. Then when some things don’t work out, maybe you go on an interview and it doesn’t work out, or you eat a donut and you start to lose your motivation. That’s when you start to see how committed you really are. If you are 100% committed at that point you will know that an interview where you didn’t get a job offer is part of the game, eating a donut is a setback, and a setback is part of the game. When you’re 100% committed you will expect a few fails along the way, you will expect setbacks, you’ll know they happen and you’ll keep going, you won’t quit for a minute because you’ll already be onto your next opportunity.
5) Believe 100% (no matter what) that the outcome you want is possible
If you want to get a job at a tech company downtown for 70k/year you need to 100% believe that that company and role are out there and available to you. You have to believe it if you have doubts and you let them creep into your brain they can overpower your ability to get the result you’re after. You have to believe it as if it was a given that it’s going to happen. For example, if you get into the car to drive to the store and you hit a red light, the first thing you think to yourself is not, “oh well I hit a red light I might as well go home now, I was never really going to make it to the store anyway” No! You don’t even question it! You just stop at the red light and keep going until you get to the store, maybe you’ll even hit a few more red lights, but that won’t stop you from getting to the store will it? Of course not! You need to look at your dream job (or whatever your goal is) just like the store. A place you know you will get to, but that it won’t be green lights all the way there. Plan for some red lights on the way but don’t be silly enough to give up just because you hit a red light.
And there we have it 5 mindset hacks to get you mentally prepared to crush an interview!
About the Author: Natalie helps people prepare and crush their interviews. If you want to learn more and make sure you’re strategically prepared for your next interview You can grab my free ultimate prep guide HERE I’ll help you get your answers straight so you can communicate your value effectively in the first meeting.
7 Comments
vijay chandora
April 12, 2019 at 8:55 pmnyc post
Jais
April 16, 2019 at 2:05 pmThanks Vijay. I am Glad that you liked it.
Suktara
April 15, 2019 at 7:46 pmLoved reading this! Such a well written post. I completely agree with this point to attend an interview without any expectations whatsoever. Although easier said then done! But it’s a very valid point.
Natalie Fisher
April 19, 2019 at 10:49 amHi Suktara, I do agree too (easier said than done) although simply being aware of what is in your control and focusing on managing it, instead of the other things that aren’t within your control is going to serve you in a better way.
Elease Colcord
April 17, 2019 at 5:14 amGreat tips. I think people get so caught up thinking that the person interviewing is at such an advantage. Not always the case!
Natalie Fisher
April 19, 2019 at 10:50 amAgreed, they need you too, or they wouldn’t be hiring for the role!
Anirudh Singh
September 11, 2020 at 2:29 pmHey Natalie,
Hats off your to depth in writing and your insights on the finest of the ideas on job interviews. Your 1st point on unattachment where you have related dating to interviews is superb and relatable to the entire crowd of this generation.
I personally have faced this emotion after many failed interviews, so could relate your post very well with my situation.
This is a one year old post, however in this covid situation where recruiters have been dominating job seekers, such an article is definitely of great help.
Keep writing. Fan of your in depth & pint point writing